Dear Jane, School’s Out and I’m Stressing Out
I’m a mother to three school-age children and it’s been only a few months since they went back to school full-time and in-person. It seemed as though that right when we got our virtual learning routine down, the kids were whisked back into socially distanced classrooms.
But I do have a confession to make. When they went back to school, it was such a relief from having them in the house all day with me whileI was also trying to juggle running my business from home, keeping my husband happy, and finding quality time to take care of myself.
Now that summer is officially here and school is officially out, I’ve officially started stressing out. I’m happy that my kids are home, but trying to keep them occupied and entertained all day is proving more challenging than I thought.
Jane, how do I enjoy the summer with my kids when I’m secretly craving some time alone?
– xoxo, Stressed Out Summer Mom
The best moms are the ones that know that they have to be fulfilled, happy, and whole in order to take care of their children in a healthy way and to be a living example of what it means to love yourself.”
Dear Stressed Out Summer Mom,
The first thing that I would like to do is to commend you for being so honest and transparent about how you’re feeling. Society sometimes guilts women into believing that in order to be a “good mom” that they have to want to be with their children all of the time and that they have to sacrifice their own happiness for their children.
But known of those self-limiting beliefs are true. You can still be a “good mom” and prioritize your own well-being and want to honor taking personal time and space to fill up your own cup.
In fact, the best moms are the ones that know that they have to be fulfilled, happy, and whole in order to take care of their children in a healthy way and to be a living example of what it means to love yourself.
So don’t fret stressed out momma, below are some ways to keep your cool this summer while taking care of your little ones and yourself.
Instead of the traditional playdate of having the moms (or dads) all come together to watch their children play and hangout, make a plan to have only one or two of the moms (or dads) watch all of the children during a designated day and time, which then frees you up to go shopping, take a nap, hit the spa, have a glass of wine, relax in a Go Away, I’m Fizzy CBD-infused bath, or just do whatever makes you happy.
Then next time, you can watch all of the kids while the other parents have their me-time. It’s a great way to make sure that your children are having fun and are taken care of, while intentionally taking time to take care of yourself as well.
Have a Hello Mellow + Nighty Night Self-Care Plan
When it comes to anxiety and stress, there may be no better all-natural solution than the Hello Mellow capsules. Taking one in the morning, and then as-needed and as-directed throughout the day, may aid in calming the mind, steadying the heartbeat, easing anxiety, and reducing stress. If you’re proactively managing your anxiety and stress in a healthy way, it’ll be easier to navigate having to keep your kids busy and entertained throughout the day and you’ll be less likely to be triggered by their inevitable temper tantrums.
Also try to incorporate consistent bedtimes for your children so that you have time to properly unwind, destress from the day, and have quality time with your significant other. I would also recommend stocking up on the all-natural sleep aid capsule, Nighty Night.
Having a peaceful and restorative night’s rest is paramount to having enough energy to be present with their children throughout the day. Once you’re able to calm your own mind, it’ll be easier to enjoy the time that you spend with your children.
Set Mommy Boundaries
Depending on the age of your children, set “Mommy Me-Time Hours” as part of your family routine, either every day, every few days, or every week. For example, this means that you let your children know that during the time of 10:00am to 12:00pm every Saturday morning is “Mommy’s Me Time,” so if any issues arise, ask daddy or whomever your partner may be, for help.
Of course, if a real emergency arises then they can come to you, but this is to get them into the habit of allowing you to have your special alone time. You can use your time to work-from-home, exercise, paint, meditate, watch reality TV, or just do whatever you want to do in your own home without being disrupted.
Happy summer momma!
Jane is the fictional heroine of the Betoken lifestyle blog, Good For Jane. Think of Jane as your virtual BFF. She lives a healthy lifestyle, but not like, over the top. When it’s not a pandemic, she loves hanging out with her friends, dating, and exercising in public. Throughout the pandemic she has baked her fair share of sourdoughs, gotten more than her fair share of takeout to “support her local restaurants”, ordered wine online and taken plenty of CBD to keep the anxiety at bay.
Jane is also the editor of the Dear Jane column. If you have a question for Jane, you can email her at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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